Everyday we audition? For role of Mother, friend, wife, lover. The list goes on. As you live your life dodging bullets, mending wounds, unclogging your ears to hear the needs of your loved ones.
We, with good intention try, and that is a victory within itself, "To try"...Either we demand too much or too little...The scales are always tipped, in who's favor, I am never quite sure. We go over losses and hurts and feel as if we have healed old wounds, and yet the scars so deep are pushed to the surface during stressful times. We hear once again how we fell short, we didn't come through, we said "yes" when we should have said "no". Turned "right" when we should have turned "left".
We parent our children based on their individual needs, what one needs the other does not require. Our jobs as mom's and dad's are ever changing. What TV shows as normal, is usually a stretch. Perhaps dinner isn't always on the table at 5:00 or Bedtime comes way to late. Homework is put off, because in all honesty sometimes us educated parents just forget how to solve for X.
I do know that we all as parents want better for our children. Some may want more as in tangible things, others may just want to have the lines of communication open. That secrets don't exist between the walls we share, and that saying "you can talk to me about anything" really means just that.
It is a complex world we live in and all families have there complexities, mine is no exception. I do know this if we "love" ourselves we will most certainly "love" our children. Asking your children for forgiveness is tough, but asking yourself is tougher.
So, pick yourself up, dust off yesterday-knowing it will at times rear it's ugly head and say, I am strong enough to love myself today and tomorrow.
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